Thank you Wired… thank you

19 03 2009

It’s the newsstory intro that we prayed for, but never truly believed could happen.

*clears throat* According to Wired *drumroll*:

Huge news for real-life ray guns: Electric lasers have hit battlefield strength for the first time — paving the way for energy weapons to go to war.

Great! Lasers are now over the 100-kilowatt threshold for weapons grade awesomeness! Then that must mean I can go git me a Star Wars-style blaster and go git some! Right, Noah?

That much power won’t get you a Star Wars-style blaster.

Well that’s f&^%$£g useless then, isn’t it? Bah. Shouldn’t have got my hopes up. After all, could anything really top CNN’s Stars-Wars-style-anti-mosquito-blasters-mounted-to-the-tops-of-lampposts-in-African-villages-story?

This, remains for me, the quote of the decade. Dr Jordin Kate, the man who invented the Stars Wars anti-mosquito laser defence system, said:

There is no such thing as a good mosquito

True. No arguments there Dr Evil, sorry, Dr Kate. (And is ‘Dr Kate’ pronounced like the girl’s name or as in the martial art – Karate? Can the man who harnessed the terrible lethality of the laser blaster really be named after a girl? For the sake of clarity, ‘et’s just call him Dr Jordin Karate.)

Ah well. Best to contemplate the awesome destructive power of weapons grade lasers with nice a cuppa tea and a sit down. Oh yes…

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